Review: The VelociPastor 2 at Sydney Underground Film Festival

September 10, 2026

There are a few films in life you need to watch whilst completely wasted, confused, and sleep deprived. Written and directed by Jesse Gouldsbury, Velocipastor 2 is one of them. If the title doesn’t give it away Velocipastor 2 is the sequel to Brendan Steere’s 2017 B-movie comedy horror cult classic Velocipastor where protagonist Pastor Doug Jones gets infected with a curse that turns him into a velociraptor after the death of his parents who died in a VFX car fire. Naturally, Jones commits to a life of avenging his parents to ensure justice is served and fights crime as, a dinosaur.

Not having seen the first film, I had no idea what was happening, but I decided to lean into my confusion. I’d seen a few clippings about Velocipastor on social media, showcasing the film’s bad yet super appealing VFX – perhaps my algorithm knows me too well. The premise is thus, after finding out that he transforms into a dinosaur when angry, ex-pastor Doug Jones (Greg Cohan) is in Milan, Italy with his partner Carol (Alyssa Kempinski) and best friend Paulo (John DiMino) to track down a masked killer who’s on the hunt to sacrifice 1000 virgins at an Italian Fertility Festival. Yes. You read that right.

Adorned with dinosaurs, dicks, and death, Velocipastor 2 has an undeniable charm with a few killer lines like, ‘I just can’t stop thinking about that sex-maniac killer.’ Truthfully, I can’t stop thinking about sex-maniacs killers either.

Directed by Jesse Gouldsbury, cinematographer of the first Velocipastor film, Velocipastor 2 has Gouldsbury team up with fellow screenwriter Brendan Steere and previous director of the first film who now takes on the role of editor for this sequel. An absurd, highly creative feature with certain homoerotic undertones that makes you laugh the film can only be described as ‘an experience.’

Expect really bad action sequences made with toy figurines, most likely due to safety and budget constraints, puppets, bad action sequences, dick jokes, awkward hip thrusts, and a man running through a field in an inflatable dinosaur consume. Stuff I’d expect men to do whilst hammered on a night out with ‘the boys’. Clearly, I have high standards.

Complete with closeups of flaccid penises, a really bad karaoke sequence and out of sync dialogue, the film is stupid enough to inspire filmmakers to create really bad films that invite audiences to connect. The improvement in this sequel is the increased production budget thanks to crowdfunding, and the absurdity and campiness of the film thankfully has been retained in this sequel, a charm what gives the Velocipastor series its appeal. Paired with a soundtrack that uses a vocoder and 80s synths, the film’s music and visuals are overly expressive and the over-the-top accents that is set to offend many groups in equal measure.

Clearly, Velocipastor 2 isn’t highbrow, but I would consider it a relatable film as I too, being the occasionally annoyed and easily pissed off female would probably also turn into a dinosaur as well if provoked to fight injustice. If only. Expect to watch this in a cinema with a group of strangers, possibly and predominantly men, who share in your love of shitty B-movies, potentially at Sydney Underground Film Fest where friendships may form after bonding over lines such as, ‘Paulo doesn’t know I can turn into a dinosaur’ and ‘I will be kept safe by the power of my virginity.’

Sleep deprivation and beers might assist with this dilemma you’ve found yourself in watching Velocipastor 2, but I would not fight its strange charm, simply just enjoy the experience of watching something so absurd it celebrates human creativity and of course, dinosaurs.

VelociPastor 2 is playing at SUFF this Saturday 12th Sept. For details and tickets, go here.

Review by Addy Fong.